As with anything in life, myths and superstitions can be created. In the case of divorce mediation, there are countless assumptions that can be made by people who don't have the understanding of what the process actually entails. Divorce mediation is essence is a way for you and your spouse to peaceably address the many factors involved in your pending divorce. This allows you two to discuss throughout these details in order to reach a reasonable agreement, as opposed to taking each other to court and draining one spouse of everything. Mediation is an amicable method used by people who hope to at least remain civil in their relationship post-divorce, particularly in the event that there are children involved. Below you will find some of the myths of divorce mediation debunked.

If we use mediation, my spouse will still dominate the conversation. Fortunately, this is the very reason mediation exists. To make sure that does not happen. Divorce mediation is led by a third party member who is unbiased towards either side of the divorce, and it is their job to facilitate the conversation in such a way that all voices are heard. Obviously, there are situations for which a spouse cannot be controlled; in this case the mediation will be placed on hold.

Woman have a disadvantage. Court and mediation gives woman the same opportunity for fairness in the divorce, they are no different. In many cases it is believed that when using mediation, woman have a great likelihood of a desired result because they are able to talk through more of their goals at the mediation table. Mediation gives the spouses a chance to work not only through the specific details of custody, support, and asset division; but they can also work through non-legal matters that won't be discussed in the courtroom.

Mediation is more complicating then court. Divorces are complicating, period. How you choose to go about the process is entirely up to you; but a mediation does offer each of the spouses the chance to work through their settlement as opposed to risk losing something they highly value. When choosing to use mediation, you will still want to guidance of an attorney who can oversee your legal necessities, contracts, etc. A divorce includes a lot of information gathering, many documents, and time; and with the help of an attorney it can be made more simple. In many cases, though not all; mediation can be less expensive than court because you will not have to come up with the court fees on top of having an attorney.

Mediation is for weak people. While some may feel that court is a "macho" and "brave" approach to a divorce, mediation not only offers couples the chance to fairly come to a conclusion for their settlement but it also allows them to learn communications skills in the process. You will have the opportunity to improve confidence in yourself as you fight for what is rightfully yours, while at the same time learning how to compromise in exchange. Mediation is for people who want to help each other, it is not a weak or wimpy method.

Court is a faster process. Actually, for many couples using mediation as opposed to going to court, will save time in the process. Depending on where you live the court process can be lengthy as you wait for your time slot. Also, this is where you will have the chance to talk through your goals, and hear each other's preferences rather than fighting it out in court.

The mediator is the one who makes the final decision. This is a completely wrong understanding of what mediation is. Divorce mediation involves a third party member who is there to initiate conversation and help address the every factors of your divorce. They are not here to determine what the conclusion should be, but rather their purpose is to facilitate conversation and allow everyone the opportunity to speaking their minds and fight for their wants and needs. Their goal is to help the spouses make a fair negotiation of the terms of their divorce. This would include determining child custody, as well as the schedules for how this will be accomplished. Who gets the car or the house; how the debt is split up, etc.

Mediation is good for every couple. This sadly, is not true either. Mediation may not be the answer for some couples, though it is profitable for many. Perhaps you are dealing with a domestic violence situation in which you home is unsafe. You will still want to contact an attorney for legal guidance and considering filing a restraining order as well as a divorce. If your spouse is a substance abuser or alcoholic, mediation will likely not be the answer here either because they won't want to hear what you have to say. If your life or your children's is at risk, other methods are available to help you.

Divorce mediation is not a practice that is favored by every family and divorce attorney, however it is a widely common approach for couples wanting to have a peaceful divorce settlement. Many couples who share children find the benefits of mediation as a helpful stepping ground for their co-parenting plans down the road, as well. Either way, if you are at all considering a divorce; contact a local family and divorce attorney in your area for legal guidance on your specific situation. Every case is unique, and you want to find a lawyer who is both compassionate and experienced who can help you with the process.